Let me tell you something, folks. In the year 2026, the gaming landscape has been utterly dominated by one single, glorious, and utterly insane achievement: my flawless, no-hit, electric saxophone-only completion of Elden Ring. That's right. While other so-called "pro gamers" were still struggling with regular controllers, I, DrDeComposing, ascended to a plane of existence where melody and murder became one. I didn't just play the game; I performed a symphony of destruction on its most formidable demigods, and I did it without taking a single scratch. This isn't just a playthrough; it's a declaration of war on conventional gaming itself.

The Final Movement: A Masterclass in Saxophone Slaughter

Picture this: my Tarnished, clad in nothing but glorious, defiant nudity—because why wear armor when you have pure, unadulterated skill?—standing before the final, cosmic horrors of the Lands Between. The air crackles with tension. I raise my electric saxophone, an instrument of creation now repurposed for annihilation. With a blistering riff that would make a bard weep, I launch the assault. Radagon of the Golden Order, a being of divine power, is dismantled in seconds. Before the golden dust even settles, the Elden Beast, a star-spewing abomination, meets the same fate. The entire climactic duel was over in less time than it takes most players to panic-roll off a cliff. It wasn't a fight; it was a statement, a virtuoso performance of violence.

Let's break down why this is the pinnacle of gaming in 2026:

• The Instrument: An electric saxophone. Not a guitar hero controller, not a dance pad. A saxophone. Every button press, every dodge, every spell cast, was mapped to a note or a key. My thumbs weren't on analog sticks; they were crafting a lethal jazz solo.

• The Stipulation: No hits. Zero. Nada. One mistimed note, one off-key toot, and the entire 100+ hour run would be dust. The pressure was astronomical.

• The Competition: Sure, others have used weird controllers. Dance mats? Child's play. Brainwave controllers? Amateur hour. Goldfish? Please. But NO ONE, until me, had ever claimed the ultimate prize: a perfect, hitless run with such an absurd peripheral.

This achievement stands as the definitive answer to the question: "How far can human skill and ingenuity go?" The answer, my friends, is all the way to becoming the Elden Lord, one funky note at a time.

The Aftermath: A Community in Saxophone-Shaped Chaos

While I was busy redefining what it means to "git gud," the rest of the Elden Ring world was dealing with its own brand of madness, courtesy of FromSoftware's latest, and perhaps most baffling, update. It's 2026, and the PvP scene is in absolute shambles. The developers, in their infinite and mysterious wisdom, decided to patch in a... feature... from Dark Souls 3. They've resurrected the infamous frontstab backstab. You read that correctly. Players can now perform a backstab animation on an opponent who is directly facing them. The community reaction has been a beautiful cacophony of rage and confusion.

The Colosseums, once arenas of honorable (or dishonorable) combat, have descended into pure chaos. The old, dreaded "backstab fishing" meta has returned with a vengeance. Duels are no longer about spacing, weapon arts, or magic. They're about two players frantically circling each other, trying to trigger this janky, glitch-looking animation where your character phases through an opponent's guard from the front to stab them in the back. The visual is ridiculous, the balance is shattered, and a significant portion of the player base is furious.

The Good (For Some)	The Bad (For Most)
🎭 Adds chaotic, unpredictable hilarity to fights.	🤬 Completely undermines strategic positioning and spacing.
👑 Rewards hyper-aggressive, unpredictable play.	🐟 Brings back the toxic "fishing" playstyle everyone hated.
😂 The animation is so broken it's almost charming.	🚮 Makes the combat look and feel cheap and buggy.

Given FromSoftware's current, glacial pace of updates—we're lucky to get one a year now—this bizarre new reality is our home for the foreseeable future. The Lands Between are now a place where you can be flawlessly mastered by a saxophone-wielding nudist in PvE, only to log into PvP and get teleport-stabbed by someone staring you dead in the eyes. It's a beautiful, broken mess, and I wouldn't have it any other way.

So, to all the aspiring challengers out there: the bar has been set. Your dance mats and your bananas and your voice commands are cute, but they're history. The future of challenge runs is musical, it's flawless, and it's spectacularly loud. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a saxophone to polish. I'm thinking of tuning it up for a no-hit run through the Shadow of the Erdtree DLC... on NG+7. Wish me luck. Or better yet, don't. I don't need it.